Pain in the head

                                      I have pain in the head with heaviness

I experience a unique happiness

Brief moments of depressing, spiritual darkness

Mighty music plays of the triumphal march through the wilderness

I feel alive not just breathing, an impossible passion

Of which people have no conception

Ecstatic, strong, and sweet beyond a shadow of a doubt

A blissful spirit trapped between heaven and earth

 In the oncoming pall of a blackout.

Depression of survival swallows me

Memories flashed like lightning while someone blurted out in a hurry

As the veil was lifted I laughed out loud

Starry-eyed giddiness under the twinkling sky

All agitation, doubts, and worries angry and desperate magically fly

 Head seems to shut down but  a refusal to come plummeting down

Inside the large head a great calm, full of understanding

Yet these moments, these glimmerings, and shadows culminating

The bitterness of underlying the experience, all mysteries flashed 

As a sudden revelation staggering came consciousness 

With a vacant look felt both pain and numbness

Intelligence and knowledge swayed by delusion

It felt like Father came to admonish me for my weakness

Nerves immobilized my tongue and swallowed by confusion

As for the rest, to come to the conclusion

I awoke with pain in the head.