Thursday, July 1, 2021

Extend help and cooperation for the cause of needy

 




 




I have a rare disease called VHL or Von-Hippel Lindau--this is a cancer-suppressing gene and those people who have VHL disease have a mutation, turning you into a tumour producing factory.

In my case, blood-filled tumours form in up to 10 organs of the body.

The only treatment is the removal of tumours, irradiation, and monitoring.

Unfortunately, multiple tumours formed in the liver which splayed,compressed and displaced vital vessels and I had a liver transplant leading to turning off of the immune system. 


The side effect in question? These medications may increase your risk of infection. 


This almost implies that if you are taking some of these medications you will fall ill every time you pass by someone with the sniffles along with the big stuff, like the flu or tuberculosis or end up with Covid like me.


I experienced horrors that would give most people nightmares for life but the thing is if you face serious issues from a younger age you don't cringe inside or give up on life. The older you get without ever having a real problem you don't know how to handle it. Starting early gives you a perspective if you don't die first. 


After 15 surgeries including kidney cancer apart from the above-mentioned Liver transplant and infections like MDR TB including pulmonary, lymph and bone.


I was diagnosed with leptomeningeal hemangioblastomas after the cyberknife in 2013.


Detecting and treating the condition of leptomeningeal hemangioblastoma without delay seems to help survival, though the number of patients analysed is small. The most common cause of death is respiratory failure due to pontomedullary or cervical cord compression.


Currently, I am suffering from serious multiple brain tumours reported globally from 1902-2013 only 132 cases and perhaps I am the first one in India. The small tumours floating around in the fluid used for cushioning the brain and spine tend to compress all the nerves that come their way. Hence the first nerve to be compressed was the optico-hypothalamic nerve which made me blind with my right eye even after killing radiation therapy.



I got a swallowing problem. The cranial nerves associated with the swallowing process are the trigeminal (V), facial (VII), glossopharyngeal (IX), vagus (X), accessory (XI) - usually not considered - and hypoglossal (XII).


After 2017 I also have a chronic ischemic brain. Cerebral ischemia or brain ischemia, and when there isn’t enough blood flow to the brain leading to limited oxygen supply it may lead to the death of brain tissue, or ischemic stroke.


A proton beam directed at a tumour travels in a straight trajectory towards its target, gives off most of its energy at a defined depth called the Bragg peak, and then stops. While X-rays often deposit more energy within the healthy tissues of the body than within the tumour.


The mutation of the gene is confirmed in AIIMS research.


I  have no income. I write for Times of India digital without honorarium and my mother who is a pensioner draws barely enough pension to feed and clothe us, leave alone pay for my medical expenses. Friends donate who think I should live more and write more.



There were multiple cysts in the pancreas already. They blocked the exocrine functions ( enzymes) and for a couple of months, I had to run to the bathroom after every meal. After Creon SD microgranules were prescribed my diarrhoea feels better but you can confirm it is around Rs 3000 and lasts for only 2 days. 


The hypoxia-inducible transcription factors have also been shown to play a crucial role in tumour promotion in other cancers including breast, brain, colon, gastric, lung, skin, ovarian, prostate, renal, pancreatic. Increased levels of growth factors result in angiogenesis.




All people with VHL disease should be carefully followed by a physician or medical team familiar with the disorder.



The complexity of their existence, the trials of maladies forced me to struggle to live.



The will to live is an unstoppable thing. Most people live only when they are about to die. 





It may sound complicated, but having a VHL diagnosis shouldn’t consume a patient’s life. In fact, monitoring through routine screenings is one of the most important components of care for patients with the inherited condition, which puts them at an increased risk for developing tumors.


The will to live is an unstoppable thing. Most people live only when they are about to die. 




Please donate for my proton therapy according to your preferences and ability 

As delay can cost my life.











https://www.ketto.org/fundraiser/help-payel-bhattacharya-survive-vhl-genetic-multi-system-disorder


 









With my current doctors, I feel unlimited emotional gratification

 






My indigent miserable diseases, 

From which previous, way too many doctors

 Had recoiled in horror or disbelief, 

Shun me with a relief


The seriousness with which these hallucinations, 

Beyond my wildest dreams, beyond imagination

Along with in some precarious situation


  Have been evaluated—by current doctors, 

I feel unlimited gratification


Most doctors of this period had never heard of leptomeningeal hemangioblastomas

No, don't try to find it on Wikipedia 

How spillage if tumor cells cause

They float without any pause

With a fatal function

Nerve compression



The floating stars in the cushioning fluid 

Unless Getafix the druid

By breaking news to the clueless

Irradiating the floaters is not useless

They decompress


But radiation ought to travel in a straight trajectories 

Said the druid guided by his old memories

Depositing the energy on the floaters

Not healthy tissue 

Incessantly pressing the issue




Chronic tiredness;

Electric currents terribly, horribly buzz, 

One could die due to the head full of buzz

Upon investigating the cause

Congestion of the chest 

or abdominal discomfort

Liquid diarrhea

Coming out of the bathroom with a funky fresh idea

Sudden blurry vision 

Moments of indecision

I've got a nagging dazed suspicion

In my slumber see the dreams Elysian 

Fizzy burps

That erupts

yet dimly understood, although it almost certainly involves a dysfunction

Of some internal organs 




Behind all learned was in Nature's laws

Genes with flaws 



Using shears to snip the tumor-free

Tumor explosion not been documented extensively


Emergency surgical procedures, usually in times of war or pandemic

I've faced several gimmicks


An artificial virus with multi-dimensional qualities that Provokes the craving to bait its victims


The terrifying outbreak of fever

Would cling to thee forever

Dry cough

Leading to an explulsive one that doesn't stop 


Though there is no known cure, there are many treatments that regard symptoms,

Divine Phantom of evolutionary disease can't be prevented

But can be treated








Wednesday, June 30, 2021

A meaningful life




A meaningful life

 Simple in pattern, unique, practical, desirable and informed

Entangled in poetic licence I feel logically steadily alarmed


Expressive life  draws upon, and practices, a range of our higher capacities; 

Those bound up with warmth, camaraderie, kindness

Self-understanding, sympathy, intelligence and creativity.

Look everywhere and see positivity

The meaning of life is to glare at the challenges 

Which you meet face to face with  in your loneliness.


Unwittingly, loneliness gives us the most meaningful insights

Spirited hopes are always a delight 

An immense percentage of snobs, I believe, is to be found in every rank of this mortal life.

Only in certain circumstances and relations of life.

Vulnerabilities and will power to survive. 

It is reasonable to have tantrums, moods

With every change in moods

There is no bad attitude 


 To sing badly or cry.

Like Cacofonix the bard

With tune so marr'd

All will be tolerated if there is some

 Less than charm or simply wickedness for a period of time.

Life from a comically

 Complex impossibility 

Something we can all comprehend,

Aim for and 

Sometimes succeed at.

Tuesday, June 29, 2021

Fill a life with hope extend help and cooperation

 



I have a rare disease called VHL or Von-Hippel Lindau--this is a cancer-suppressing gene and those people who have VHL disease have a mutation, turning you into a tumor-producing factory.


In my case, blood-filled tumors form in up to 10 organs of the body.


The only treatment is the removal of tumors, irradiation, and monitoring but unfortunately, multiple tumors formed in the liver which splayed, compressed, and displaced vital vessels and I had a liver transplant leading to turning off of the immune system.


The side effect in question? These medications may increase your risk of infection. 




This almost implies that if you are taking some of these medications you will fall ill every time you pass by someone with the sniffles along with the big stuff, like the flu or tuberculosis, or end up with Covid.


I was diagnosed with leptomeningeal hemangioblastomas after the cyber knife in 2013.



Between 1902 and 2013, approximately 132 cases have been recorded.


Detecting and treating the condition of leptomeningeal hemangioblastoma without delay seems to help survival, though the number of patients analysed is small. The most common cause of death is respiratory failure due to pontomedullary or cervical cord compression.


I have no income. I write for Times of India digital without honorarium and my mother who is a pensioner draws barely enough pension to feed and clothe us, leave alone pay for my medical expenses. Friends who think I am worthy of life more than expected  and write more donate for my medicine and the rest of my survival needs


Currently I am suffering from a serious multiple brain tumor perhaps I am the first one in India. The small tumors floating around in the fluid used for cushioning the brain and spine tend to compress all the nerves that come their way. Hence the first nerve to be compressed was the optic hypothalamic nerve which made me blind with my right eye even after killing radiation therapy.


I got a swallowing problem. The cranial nerves associated with the swallowing process are the trigeminal (V), facial (VII), glossopharyngeal (IX), vagus (X), accessory (XI) - usually not considered - and hypoglossal (XII). 


After 2017 I also have a chronic ischemic brain. Cerebral ischemia or brain ischemia, and when there isn’t enough blood flow to the brain leading to limited oxygen supply it may lead to the death of brain tissue, or ischemic stroke.




The electrons can be made to strike a tungsten target within the head of the accelerator to create a beam of photons (or “X-rays”). These X-ray beams are then directed at the site of cancer. Photons have no charge or mass and can be regarded as small packets of energy. Photons deposit their energy along the entire path that they travel through the body. Therefore, a beam of X-rays irradiates not only the area of the tumour but also the healthy tissue that the beam encounters on its way towards the tumour and beyond the tumour. X-rays used for treating cancer usually do not stop within the body. X-rays travel right through you. On the other hand, proton beam therapy is delivered by larger, much more expensive accelerators called cyclotrons and synchrotrons.




A proton beam directed at a tumour travels in a straight trajectory towards its target, gives off most of its energy at a defined depth called the Bragg peak, and then stops. While X-rays often deposit more energy within the healthy tissues of the body than within the tumour.




The mutation of the gene is confirmed in AIIMS research.






 

There were multiple cysts in the pancreas already. They blocked the exocrine functions ( enzymes) and for a couple of months I had to run to the bathroom after every meal. After Creon SD microgranules were prescribed my diarrhea feels better but you can confirm it is around Rs 3000 and lasts for only 2days.





These tumors are extremely vascular. A biopsy would make them bleed resulting in tumor cells spillage, resulting in more tumours and meningitis.

VHL is a tumor suppressor protein that is localized in the nucleus or cytoplasm, the extent to which being dependent on cell density.



The hypoxia-inducible transcription factors have also been shown to play a crucial role in tumour promotion in other cancers including breast, brain, colon, gastric, lung, skin, ovarian, prostate, renal, pancreatic. Increased levels of growth factors result in angiogenesis.



The will to live is an unstoppable thing. Most people live only when they are about to die. 


After 15 surgeries including kidney cancer apart from the above-mentioned Liver transplant I want to survive my life threatening condition.


I, who swam the seas with vigor, without any complaint, felt the warmth of sunshine in the emptiness of my life, from the quest for knowledge I got to know more about my diseases.


My request is to help me according to your preferences and ability.




Life has many pretty song


Physically weaker with mind strong




 My eager combat and real fight


For what's wrong from what's right




Thoughts swirl in my mind


I seek till I find


As thoughts entwined 


I write what conquer my mind


Till my eyes go blind




The more I express my unquenchable thirst for life


In my troubles and strife


Under a surgeon's knife


Countless times


Chasing me throughout my life


But the helpful plunging knife


Longer my life 


Did you ever see such a thing in your life?


To overcome the tragedies,

To survive the hardest times.

To face those moments filled with pain,

And to manage I need the kind 

With the protectors' mind




Life is like an echo
Shout out
Send the sound
Comes with back
Reverberate, resound
What you sow
You reap
You give even when you know that person can't give back 
You get from Divinity















Selfish is senseless

 






I mean, say that you figure that

Everything is senseless, 

Then it can't be quite senseless 

Because you are aware that it's senseless 

 Your awareness of senselessness 

Almost makes sense. 

Isn't everything absurd 


Life's been a jolly good joke on me,

And now is the time to laugh.

For a day and a half

I am a zebra, not a giraffe


'The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool."

Said the great playwright, poet

Actor known far and wide


Isn't everything absurd?

In truth everything is absurd

I am a poor little bird who wishes to fly

But know life can be summed up in one word.

Life is not triumph but struggle, 

They try to make a double

Senseless, disorienting, and often menacing complexity

Fools tryin' to pull apart the life's puzzle of immortality


Essential to have fought well. 

Trying to learn from what's behind

 Never knowing what's in store

 Makes each day a constant battle to stay between the shores.



Badly broken world, full of wars and cruelty

 Is a senseless tragedy. 

Every human being who inhabits it is served his or her Portion of unhappiness and wakeful nights

Born to see strange sights


I find no peace, and all my war is undone

With sensitive instincts, being a creative one

Using language developed in all sorts of way

 With stunning precision 

To give verbal or written l expression 

And coherence, linking each word naturally with succeeding one


Feeding on sorrow and laugh in all my pain;

Likewise, displeaseth me both life and death,

And my delight is the cause of this strife.


Hope gives me wings I fly above the wind, yet can I not arise;

Society is blindly programmed to preserve the selfish molecules 

Geniuses are but silly fools

Generosity and altruism, because all are born selfish hurtful

Everything must come full circle

It is hard to believe that this simple truth is not understood by those leaders who forbid

 their followers to be self-centered

Are themselves happy cynosure

Climbing over

Putting their needs

Above the real needy

In their dictionary doesn't exist 'give'

Vultures feed

Not calling themselves greedy

Yet not helping the needy



Individuals are not stable things, they are fleeting

In the beginning, was simplicity.

In the middle crept in complexity

But genes are denizens of geological time: 

The stairway of evolution has been a long hard climb

Latest gossip of all the time,

Genes are forever. Start a new kind of evolution.


The rabbit runs faster than the fox, 

Because the rabbit is running for his life 

While the fox is only running for his dinner.


Words are only tools for expression

I feed me in hope and laugh in all my pain;


Leaping from brain to brain

An evolutionary selfishness

Universal love and welfare are senseless

Vague sense 

natural selection of stable forms and a rejection of unstable


Altruistic system is open to abuse

 By selfish individuals, ready to exploit it.

Because they're the chosen ones


Saturday, June 26, 2021

To me, it seems life is but a dream within a dream.

 



Speechless, my friend,

Just remember that death is not the end


The truth is that any breath of any day could be our last

Where courage is a thing of the past,

Open up to the probabilities with a deeper awareness 

Of momentary Life

In  the ravine of humble life,

Worked up to it through toil and strife.


If every day we acknowledge the fact that we will die,

It might be today, perhaps we will learn to truly live.


By seizing every opportunity, every day,

 Living life to the full with passion, tenacity, 

Courage and sense of adventure

Find a new pleasure

Feel strong will 

Like hard malleable steel 

See the frame around his sight

In the fairy tale journey



If every day we acknowledge the fact that we will die, 

It might be today, perhaps we will learn to truly live.


Whilst we cannot cheat death, 

In some way, we can live

 So that we can laugh in its face.


What we plant in life's furrow 

The  seed of today is the flower and fruit of the morrow

We reap what we sow


While performing action,

Living on the sphere of attraction,

  Concentrating.on how well we can perform

With reverence and great respect very much the norm

 Without being concerned about its result. 

Fighting without thinking about the result


We should do our best and leave the rest to the supreme

All actions should be performed with an independent spirit And with firm faith in the Supreme power

Who is the dispenser

 Of fruits and justice of all actions

. We should accept the consequences 

without any grudge and complaint.



While Universe will test every nerve,

You get what you deserve,

Whatever you put your time, talent and energy 

you get back. 

You reap what you sow means you must eventually face the consequences of your actions.


Human beings with own ego or the clamouring around him In that noise of hustle and bustle

Jostling and pushing through the tunnel 

He pays no attention to the ever present voice of Eternity. 


He  can hear that voice only when he attains inner confidence 

 His ever changing mind rest in complete peace and inner harmony.

I Ain't goin' nowhere so fast

Gotta live with Mummy